Life and stress

I think today I realized how much stress I was going through lately, and I think i found the best way to relieve that stress. Lately I have been thinking how sad it is that people cannot look for the best in others, I think that it is such a travesty that they can’t find the goodness in their hearts to forgive, or forget. Even I have been in a nonforgiving mood toward my friend, I mean its not like I do not have a reason, because I do. However, that doesn’t mean i can act this way, I just cannot handle anymore the way I am treated by everyone, that Oh im gonna pretend you aren’t there and halfway through your sentence I am gonna interrupt you because apparently everyone is thinking, Anything else would be better that what this guy is saying. Whether its like I am the Schwa, or if people just think I am dumb or weird or something. I am just really, really done with the way people have been treating me…. I am so done. I just want people to notice what it is like for me, I try so hard to see things from everyone’s perspectives, but   people seem they seem to think are stupid, or boring and that no matter what they do to us we will always be there if they need us, even if they push us to a place where almost everyone would give up. But I am not that strong, I have held in for almost two years, but I cannot take it anymore. I do not think that my friends understand how much effort I put into my relationships with them, but I… I just cannot try anymore. People always seem to leave me because they think when they get back they will still have me waiting for them, waiting to be rescued by them because I will always be there, but when I offer that to someone, that means that I really like being their friend and if they ruin that, its over. I think that you should value love as much as life, and value the people you love or that love you, but sadness prevails in realizing that you do not always give people the love they deserve, but, that is because and I am gonna quote this, “we accept the love we think we deserve.”  This kinda shows what I was thinking in my last entry, that people do not care as much about the value of life, but I just compared how you should be seeing love that is given to you, so maybe we should all value everything so much more, and love life, as much as we should love being alive.


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